Teaching Choral Concepts

Review

     Research shows that the seven principle losses which people endure are: (1) the loss of a loved one by death, (2) the loss of a loved one by divorce, (3) the loss of a treasured friendship, (4) the loss of citizenship or country, (5) the loss of a job or vocation, (6) the loss of a home or business, and (7) the loss of capital that represents economic protection. This book focuses on the two most severe of those types of losses: death and divorce. The grieving process is analyzed, with the typical steps in the path of recovery listed, the physical aspects of grief described, and the differences in male and female grieving explained, and then the book presents numerous principles which can be applied to hasten the recovery process. 

More than 700,000 women are widowed yearly, with only 16,000 of them remarrying each year. The book deals with the social and financial challenges they must face, the typical stresses most widows encounter, and the characteristics of their depression and loneliness. It suggests numerous actions to overcome those pitfalls and describes various sources of help as solutions are sought. 

A useful chapter written especially for widowers who are fathers of young children gives perspectives on their special needs. 

The book also deals with surviving the many traumas of a broken marriage. The various symptoms of divorce bereavement are described, with suggestions made on how to overcome the resulting problems of anxiety, anger, fear, sadness, regret, frustration, guilt, longing, and loneliness. Specific helps for bereaved children are given, as well as detailed listings of the grief and stresses which they encounter. Useful helps for stepparents are presented. Adults are counseled on how to put their lives back together socially, financially, emotionally, physically, and spiritually. An excellent chapter on trauma prevention deals with realistic ways to avoid divorce. Another treats the opportunities and challenges of living as a single person. 

Solid insights, precise descriptions, sound counsel and practical solutions are the hallmarks of this book. it's not vague theory-it's a down-to-earth, nuts-and-bolts dispensing of essential information needed by every person who is coping with bereavement. 

Table of Contents

Dedication, 5

Acknowledgment, 6

Foreword, 11

Introduction, 13

Part I--Coping with the Death of a Loved One
1. The Pain of Losing a Family Member, 17
The Purpose of this Book, 17
The Chronological Path of the Grieving Process, 17
How Long Does Grieving Last?, 19
The Physical Aspects of Grief, 20
Differences in the Grief Perception of Men and Women, 21

2. Loss by Death: How to Surmount it, 23
The Statistics of Widowhood, 23
Social Support, 24
Social Expectations, 24
Social Trials for Widows, 25
Financial Pitfalls, 26
Should You Move, 28
Social Support Systems, 30
The Principle Stresses of Widowhood, 32
The Challenge of Depression, 33

3. Counsel for Widowed Fathers, 37
Explaining Mother's Absence, 37
Acquiring New Homemaking Skills, 38
Communicating Effectively with Your Children, 38
Drawing Nurture from Support Groups, 40
Developing a New Love Relationship, 40
Blending Two Families into One, 41

Part II--Coping with the Loss of a Loved One Through Divorce
4. The Trauma of a Broken Marriage: How to Survive it, 45
Statistics on Divorce, 45
A Greater Public Acceptance of Divorce Today, 46
The Symptoms of Divorce Bereavement, 46
Overcoming Fear and Anxiety, 48
Overcoming Regret and Sadness, 49
Overcoming Frustration and Anger, 50
Overcoming Insecurity, 51
Overcoming Loneliness, 52
Overcoming Guilt, 57
Overcoming Longing, 58
Fear Questionnaire, 59
Loneliness Questionnaire, 60

5. Helping the Bereaved Child, 61
Statistics on One-parent Families, 61
Parents Need to Understand Children's Reactions to Divorce, 62
Children's Symptoms of Divorce Bereavement, 62
Younger Children, 63
Older Children, 63
Techniques for Reducing Your Child's Bereavement Stress, 64
Stepparenting, 67
Suggestions for Improving Step-parenting Skills, 68

6. Putting Your Life Back Together, 72
Finding Out What and Who You are, 72
Consider Going Back to School, 73
Changing Your Life's Focus, 74
Beware of Potential Financial Pitfalls, 75
Owning Your Own Home, 76
Credit-risk Criteria, 77
Opening the Door to the Future, 78

7. Can Divorce Be Avoided?, 80
The Five Successive Stages Leading to Divorce, 80
Considering Whether a Dysfunctional Marriage Justifies a Divorce, 82
Insights Concerning Matrimonial Stresses Which Lead to Divorce, 83
Sexual Problems as a Source of Matrimonial Stress, 85
Money Problems as a Source of Marital Stress, 87
The Need for Communication Skills, 87
Counseling Can Help Relieve Marital Stress, 90

8. The Single Life: Its Joys and Sorrows, 92
Potential Problems and Perils in Single Living, 92
The Challenge of Loneliness and Depression, 93
Techniques for Overcoming Loneliness and Depression, 94
The Advantages of a Single Life, 96
Cost of Raising a Child from Birth to Age 17, 97

Epilogue, 98
Body, Mind and spirit, 98
The Value of Meditation, Contemplation and Prayer, 99

Bibliography, 101
Grief and Bereavement Resulting from Death, 101
Books, 101
Articles, 104
Grief and Bereavement Resulting from Divorce, 107
Books, 107
Index, 109
About The Author, 111

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